Friends-The One with the Movie Starr
by caskettfriends
Summary: This episode of Friends that I've written fits somewhere in season 6. Monica and Chandler have just moved in together, and Ross hasn't told Rachel yet that they are still technically married from their Vegas trip. This episode features a guest star, a movie star named Daphne Starr whom Joey is working with.
1. Chapter 1

Friends-"The One with the Movie Starr"

Chandler and Joey are relaxing and talking over some beer when Ross walks in to the apartment.

"So, Chandler, how's living with my sister," he asked in a joking manner.

"Chandler likes making potpourri!" Joey cut in while badly mispronouncing potpourri.

Chandler jumped in to correct him. "It's potpourri, Joey," he said while stressing the correct pronunciation of potpourri. "And that was supposed to be our little secret!"

Ross came over and put a hand on Chandler's shoulder. "It's okay, man, Monica used to make me do that with her too."

"So, how's divorced life, Ross, are used to it by now?" Joey joked.

"Very funny, Joey, and the divorce isn't actually finalized yet, so I guess I still have some time to convince Rachel…"

"That you looooooove her!" Chandler interrupted while making fake smooches in the air.

"Ooh, who does Ross love?" Rachel jumped in. She had just joined the group and had overheard only Chandler's joke, not knowing they were talking about her. "Did you propose to her yet?" Rachel smirked at Ross. He blushed and tried to hide it, only making him feel more embarrassed and awkward.

"No, and she's none of your business," Ross said while trying to cover his tracks.

"Actually, I think you know her," Joey said while sharing a laugh with Chandler.

"I do?" Rachel said excitedly. She motioned for Joey and Chandler to move down so she could have a seat on the couch. Ross remained standing in a very awkward position. "C'mon Ross, who's this girl you like?" she said while playfully giving him a light punch to the shoulder.

"I'm not telling you, and guys," he said while glaring at Joey and Chandler, "hush, I'll tell her at the right time."

"Fine," Rachel said, "I'm starving anyway." She got Gunther's attention at the counter. "Hey, could you get the four of us some coffee and muffins?"

Gunther looked pleased for a moment. "Anything for you, Rachel." But then he scowled. "Sorry Ross, but there's not enough for you."

Ross turned to leave. "I have to go pick up Ben anyway, so see you guys later."

Joey and Chandler teased Ross one last time, yelling out to him, "Bye, loverboy!"

Once Ross was gone, Rachel immediately had to ask. "Okay, so who is this girl Ross is obsessed with?"

"I'm not saying anything, and Joey's not saying anything either," Chandler said while giving Joey a hard look. "Right Joey?"

Joey fiddled around in his seat. "Right…we promised not to say anything, but…I can't take this anymore!" Joey quickly got up to leave. "I gotta go, Monica's making meatloaf!" He grabbed his coat and ran out of there.


	2. Chapter 2

Back at Monica and Chandler's apartment, Monica and Phoebe were sitting at the table waiting for the meatloaf to be done. Joey came storming in and asked, "Is the meatloaf ready yet, Monica?"

"No, it's still in the oven, Joey," Monica replied.

"C'mon, we're starving here, right Phoebs?" Joey said.

Phoebe made a sour face and said, "Uh, no, I'm still not eating poor Bessy the cow."

Joey looked confused and asked, "Who's Bessy the cow? Wasn't that Monica's nickname in high school?"

"NO!" shouted Monica.

Phoebe jumped in. "Yes it was, you bought every single box of Girl Scout cookies sold that one year!"

"Hey, I was just helping those poor little girls!" Monica defended herself.

"Sure you were, Mon, but who is Bessy the cow? She sounds fun!" Joey said, still puzzled.

"Bessy the cow is who you're eating when you eat meatloaf, Joey!" Phoebe said strongly. "Didn't you know meatloaf comes from killing cows?"

Joey looked like he had just gotten the biggest shock of his life. "What?! I love cows, I don't want your…your…cow-killing meatloaf anymore, Monica! I'm gonna go order some pizza!" He stormed out of the apartment and went across the hall to his apartment. He mumbled to himself, "Pizza better not come from killing cows too or I'm screwed!" He pressed the play button on his answering machine to check for any messages. The only message was from his agent, Estelle.

"Hey Joey, it's Estelle," his answering machine said. "Just wanted to remind you that Daphne Starr is coming over to your place soon to discuss Days of Our Lives."

Joey straightened up quickly. "Oh my gosh, I completely forgot!"

Chandler casually entered the apartment with a newspaper in hand and greeted Joey.

"Man, you gotta help me clean up this place, Daphne Starr's going to be here any minute!" Joey begged.

Chandler looked up from his newspaper very quickly. "Oh my gosh, the hottest woman alive, Baywatch star Daphne Starr is coming here?!"

"I know, right! I've had a crush on her forever, I'm thinking tonight's the night I go for it!" Joey said in a very excited and high pitched voice.

"No, you can't do that, Joey," Chandler said. "Wouldn't it be weird to work together after that? Besides, she's MY dream girl, don't tell Monica!"

Just as Chandler said that, Phoebe strutted into the apartment. "Don't tell Monica what? I love secrets!" she said.

Now it was Chandler's turn to talk in an excited and high pitched voice. "Daphne Starr's coming here any minute!"

Joey begged again, this time to Phoebe. "You gotta help me clean up this place!"

A light bulb flashed in Phoebe's head. "I'll go get Monica! This is one secret you can't keep from her. She still hasn't forgiven me for not letting her clean my apartment." Phoebe rushed out of there and into the apartment across the hall.

"Monica, Joey needs help cleaning!" Phoebe said out of breath.

Monica jumped out of her seat, almost falling over. "I'll grab my label maker!" she screeched, already racing to her bedroom. She came back with a huge smile on her face and with the label maker in her hand. She and Phoebe raced back over to Joey's and Monica made record time tidying up Joey's place. Then they went back to Monica's apartment to get some ice cold lemonade.

"Wow, that was fast, I think that's your new record!" Phoebe complimented Monica.

"I KNOW!" Monica said a little too loudly with a huge grin on her face.

"While you're in a good mood, can I ask you something" Phoebe asked while pouring herself another glass of lemonade.

"Sure, what is Phoebs?" Monica answered. "Your place need some tidying up too?"

"No, but could you watch my little Foo-Foo today?" Phoebe asked.

Monica made a face. "Who's Foo-Foo?"

"My…dog," Phoebe said, quickly adding, "But before you say no, she's very cute and neat!"

"You have a dog?" Monica said, surprised. "How come I didn't know about this?"

"Well, let's just say animals aren't your thing," Phoebe said gently. "Remember my rat babies?"

"NOT THE RAT BABIES!" Monica shrieked while jumping up on the chair.

Phoebe tried to calm her down. "Whoa, Mon, no rat babies. Sorry for bringing it up."

Monica returned to sitting on her seat. "All right, I'm okay. Just no more rat babies, okay?" Phoebe nodded. Monica continued, "Phoebs, I love dogs, I'll watch Foo-Foo for you. I had a dog when I was little, poor thing was starving though since I ate all his dog food all the time. Don't judge me!"

"I won't," Phoebe reassured her. "Thanks, Mon, I'll bring Foo-Foo over later today, before I go to the doctor."

"Why do you have to go the doctor? Are you okay?" Monica asked worriedly.

"Oh, I'm fine," Phoebe smiled. "I just want to see the cute doctor again!"

Monica laughed and then looked disappointed for a moment. "I'd love to go check this cute doctor out with you, but I'm with Chandler now."

"I told you that you'd regret it!" Phoebe said.

"Oh, shut up Phoebs, I love Chandler, just get outta here before I get jealous again!" Monica smirked. Phoebe finished her glass of lemonade and then left.

Meanwhile, over at Joey's, there was a knock at the door. Joey looked through the peephole to make sure it was really her, and it was. He couldn't believe Daphne Starr was actually right outside and that he was just about to meet her!


	3. Chapter 3

Joey finally opened the door and said his famous pickup line to greet Daphne. "Hey, how you doin'?"

Daphne, however, seemed to be completely uninterested in his greeting and rushed past him into the apartment. "Ready to get this over with? Who are you again?"

"It's Joey. Joey Tribbiani," Joey reminded her. "So nice to finally meet you." He tried to shake her hand but she pulled her hand back.

"Don't touch me, your hands are probably filthy!" Daphne said rudely.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm just…" Joey stammered. "I'm just such a huge fan of yours, I've seen all your movies…"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Daphne interrupted him. "I know you probably have a crush on me since I am the hottest woman alive according to People magazine."

"Actually it was sexiest woman alive," Joey flattered her.

Daphne didn't seem to care. "Potato, potato, okay, can we get working? I have a very important eyelash curling appointment in an hour."

"Oh sure," replied Joey, "but my friends are dying to meet you, would you mind, it'll just take a minute." Joey gave her a hopeful face.

"All right, bring them in, I do love my fans, NOT," Daphne reluctantly replied while taking a seat on the couch.

Joey called out to everyone, who had been impatiently waiting in the hall, that they could come in now. Within two seconds, Monica, now holding Phoebe's dog Foo-Foo, Rachel, Phoebe, Ross, and Chandler raced in to meet the movie star.

Monica quickly whispered to Chandler, "I can see where your eyes are looking, and her eyes are much higher up!"

"Sorry, but can you blame me?!" Chandler whispered back.

"All right, but don't get used to it!" Monica shot back.

Rachel was the first to introduce herself. "Oh my gosh, Ms. Starr, it's such a pleasure to meet you, I'm such a big fan!" She started to reach out her hand, but Joey stopped her.

"NO! She doesn't like to be touched!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry…" Rachel stammered.

"Thank you Jimmy," Daphne said in an irritated way.

"It's Joey," he corrected her.

Chandler quickly whispered to Joey, "Everything seems to be going well, Jimmy!" he joked.

Joey elbowed him and whispered back, "Shut up, she'll lighten up and fall in love with my charm soon! 'How you doin'' never fails!"

Daphne interrupted their little whisper argument. "What's this dog doing here? I'm allergic!"

"Oh, she's mine, her name is Foo-Foo," Phoebe explained with a friendly smile.

"GET IT OUT OF HERE!" Daphne started to raise her voice. "My eyes might start to swell up, and then there goes the eyelash curling appointment!" By now, Daphne was almost throwing an adult temper tantrum.

Phoebe quickly took action. "Geez, sorry, I'll take her." Monica handed Foo-Foo over to Phoebe and Phoebe quickly left to take Foo-Foo across the hall.

Daphne started to calm down again, but she was still very irritable. Ross finally decided to jump in and greet Daphne.

"You look very nice today, Ms. Starr," he complimented her. "I'm…"

"Save it for the next one, cowboy," Daphne cut him off, still acting very agitated. She was used to living a luxurious life where she could get away with treating people like crap, but it didn't seem to bother any of the friends. They were probably too mesmerized by her celebrity power to care. Ross, in particular, was too flustered by being in her presence to pick up on her disinterest in any of them. He tried to compliment her again.

"Could I at least have your autograph?" he asked naively.

Rachel cut in this time, realizing Daphne's rudeness. "Oh, Ross, she probably wants to get back to work."

"I don't mind giving your boyfriend my autograph," Daphne cut in, surprising everyone. "I love that powerful feeling I get when I give out my autograph," she finished, sounding incredibly egotistical.

Rachel cut in again, trying not to sound too rude even though she wanted to be. "He's not my boyfriend," she said emphatically, motioning to Ross. "We used to date, but…" she trailed off.

"Are you kidding me?" Daphne said loudly, surprising everyone with her sudden interest in her fans. "Look at the way he's got his hand on your shoulder, honey! Maybe he's not your boyfriend anymore, but I'll bet he certainly wants to be!"

Ross looked down at his hand on Rachel's shoulder, blushing and quickly removing his hand. "What? That's ridiculous! I don't want to be her…boyfriend!" Ross said defensively and in the high pitched voice he unconsciously uses when he's lying. He pandered on. "Totally…ridiculous!"

Rachel looked at him kind of funny, trying to collect her thoughts. She didn't hate the idea that Ross possibly had feelings for her again, but she also felt a little uncomfortable because she never really did get over Ross either. Her mind started going wild with thoughts. Does Ross want us to get back together? Do I want us to get back together? Why do we have the worst timing? We got married in Vegas, now we're divorced and might start dating again? Do I really want to go down that road again, even if I still love Ross?

Rachel realized someone was trying to talk to her, so she shut off her brain for a minute and snapped back to reality.

"Rachel, are you okay?" Monica was asking. Everyone else was staring at her. Ross's cheeks had turned bright red by now.

"Yeah, just remembered I have some work to catch up on, so I'll catch you all later, okay? It was so nice meeting you Daphne," Rachel quickly said while bolting out the door. She had some major thinking to do.


End file.
